For what? Wait...it doesn't matter...regardless of why you need to leave, the answer will be no!!! - My boss to my chronically absent coworker when she asked to leave early.

~Raya, OK

What are you wearing?

My 50 year old coworker on the phone to his online girlfriend he's never met - "I wear boxer breifs, because I like the added security". Nice to know champ!!!

~Jessica, VA

Air Freshener

Just as I'm getting up from my cube to hit the little boys room, I happen to spot my older female coworker pop up from her desk and quickly spray air freshener over the wall into one of our smellier cube dwellers space next door, then drop back down and out of sight. Fearless!!!

~Aaron, SC

Defensive Posture

My coworker to his counterpart in a harsh tone- "YOU..WILL..NOT..INTIMIDATE ME!!!!". This is an office, not the WWE. Relax homie.

~Rich, VA

A good talking too

Coworker to his wife's voicemail - "I've called you 20 times now". When you're off and you say you're going to be home...I expect you to be there". Come to find out...She was taking a nap. Overreact much?

~Anonymous

The Car Wreck

My coworker apparently got into an accident this morning. He told his insurance company that the guy that hit him was "irate" and "abusive" when he finally got him to pull over. This guy's a former cop and had apparently been following the guy aggressively for quite some time, then followed him off an exit to get him to pull over...Really? Who was the abusive one?